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Author Topic: Akeldama Blood-Heart  (Read 892 times)

EdgeyReyes

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Akeldama Blood-Heart
« on: December 07, 2016, 07:01:07 AM »
CHARACTER
Theme - The Promise
Battle Theme - Stand Your Ground

Name: Akeldama Blood-Heart

Age: 17

Species and Gender: Bat faunas, female   

Symbol: A steel gear dripping in blood.

Occupation: 1st year student at Beacon Academy

Appearance:
Akeldama or rather just ďAkelĒ is a girl of five foot seven inches in height, she has white hair carefully styled which reaches to her hips and a neat red ribbon usually keeping it in a ponytail when not done up, otherwise or not at all. She tends to brush a bit of her fringe to cover her right red eye. Being a bat faunus she carries abnormally fluffy, cute white bat ears which are constantly hidden under the guise of headphones. Her sharp yellow and red eyes along with the diamond shaped pupils kinda glow in the night. She is a bit self-conscious of that fact and tends to avoid dark places unless she has special eyewear which she carries around most times.

Akelís skin is of a standard Valish complexion, usually covering up properly all the time so some might say her skin tone is a bit lighter because of this. As expected of an huntress-in-training she does have a well-defined body, but still has voluptuous curves and doesnít shy away from a chance to show off. She also bears a birthmark on the side of her neck, looks eerily similar to a vampire bite mark.

Accessories
Headphones - Akel always wears a pair of black headphones which covers both her human and faunus ears due to her hypersensitive hearing. She needs these to be able to handle everyday activities that would otherwise become impossible to do because the noise can give her a sensory overload. A touch based dial is on the right side which can control the amount of noise that she hears. Also she can plug in an aux cord to listen to music. She canít use ordinary head/earphones and it is also capable of filtering out certain sounds.

Alternate headphones - A smaller pair that go into the inside of all four of her ears. They donít contain the precision that her regular pair does, doesnít allow for music and arenít as comfortable but more convenient for formal occasions.

Silver earrings - A pair of earrings with a point on both ends. Looking almost like a dagger and someone had the great idea to make it cylindrical.

Ring - A plain ring done in black with a V shape on one side which normally sits on the upper side of her left ring finger.

Thigh strap - A strap along her right thigh which holds ammunition for her main weapon. It holds roughly fifty bullets and has a strap connecting to her belt.

Weapon holster - A seemingly regular belt, has a circular magnetic disc on each side to allow for the weapon on either side. Underneath her clothes it is also a harness to keep the belt in place even with the weight of the weapon on one side.

Huntress outfit
A dark blue, almost black turtleneck sweater with a zipper going up the middle with a ribbed pattern down the body and sleeves. The top of the turtleneck ends slightly lower than the backside. This allows her to move her head down without feeling the turtleneck on her jaw. Black suit pants with a crease line going down the front and back of each leg. Dark blue knee boots with a zipper and several straps over with a folded cuff on the top of the boot, a slight heel included.

Other that is a black double layered coat that extends to the thighs at the back and leaves the top undone. The colour of choice being dark purple on the inside. On the inside layer there is a zipper. Straps are used to secure the outer layer on the off chance she has to do it up.

Casual
A black no collared long sleeved shirt with a dark red ribbed turtleneck over it. Pants and shoe combination can vary but usually using an identical pair from her huntress outfit.

History: Akel was only raised by her father from the moment she was born, her mother who retired as a huntress soon after meeting Sabbath, passed on from giving birth to Akel. Akeldamaís name was chosen purely because her mother was under the hope that she would inherit her red hair and eyes. A trait which she didnít end up inheriting and instead got most physical traits of her father: a gold left eye, red right eye which came from her mother. Silver hair and tiny flakes around the rim of her iris in the opposite colour of which eye. A genetic trait held within her mother but brought around with both colours. However this trait was unknown since the flakes in her eyes were almost identical to her natural red eyes.

Akel wasnít a typical baby in her younger years, aside from her bat ears she was always very quiet, in fact she never made a sound. This worried her father greatly and visiting several doctors turned up with no anomalies that they could detect with their equipment. Not convinced of this he reached out to some doctorís in Atlas who found the case strange and would help to hopefully discover what was wrong with her. She stayed under watchful supervision but nothing was able to turn up, quickly running out of ideas one of the doctors thought that maybe it came from her faunus heritage.  While no records indicated that something was wrong with her or anything problematic from a genetic standpoint, they could only theorize that she had sensitive hearing. She also started to cover her ears because she was gaining that motor control. Her hearing showed to be beyond that of a normal faunus and it was the only plausible answer they came up with. The doctorís happy that they found the problem, but disappointed in themselves for being able to identify the problem through analysis. Bringing up the idea that maybe because of her hearing she unsubconsciously tries to make no noise due to her sensitivity.

Since it was the only solution he couldnít deny the possibility of it being the case. He got advice from the doctors and made notes of it to help give Akel an easier time, even at the cost of a regular childhood. Because of this Akel spent a large majority of her early childhood in her room, he had paid a pretty penny to be able to soundproof it to the best of his abilities. Despite this she was still able to hear outside the walls and this allowed her father to talk to her and Akel using a scroll to send messages to her father which allowed for communication albeit in a limited fashion but manageable.

During this time Akel was frequently visited by her motherís old Beacon team. They always visited either alone or as a team on occasion. This continued on until she was five years old, so before school he had a gift for her. It was a headset that covered both her faunus and human ears, this allowed for her to go outside despite everything still being loud, it was manageable. So she also wore a hat on top to hide the part that covered her bat ears. She didnít have a hat on but when she saw that most of the kids didnít have a pair of extra ears on their head she freaked out. Grabbing a hat from the back of the car and placing it over her head

First day was going well, she had made a few friends but did communicate using a scroll because she never really practiced her voice. This made her a bit embarrassed due to it. However one of the human kids decided to pull a prank on her. He planned to grab her hat and run with it, however in doing so he pulled off her ear protection as well. She was immediately incapacitated due to the sudden increase in noise, she just kinda froze, her hearing being completely overwhelmed in an instant. It felt like every sound throughout the school was screaming in her ears, the teachers panicked. One quick call to her dad told them over the phone what they needed to do. She was taken home for the rest of the day to calm down from the sensory overload.

Her father became cautious of letting her go to school because of what had happened on the first day, but Akel wanted to still go because it was the first time that she had friends and was able to talk with people that were her age. Cautious but didnít want to stop her since she wanted to have friends. So she went to school with the teachers knowing about her sensitive hearing so punishment would be given to any of the students who would try to take her ear protection off.

This incident whilst harmless did manage to get the attention of a small time reporter. Small time newspaper articles, nothing big. However, it was the front page of the companies article due to nothing major going on at the time. Being front page it eventually made its way to a news studio, they eventually got in contact with Akelís father and he was hesitant about this being broadcast or even filmed. However, he agreed for the slim chance that someone who could see it would be able to come up with a solution for her daughter.

So the news went on and a few weeks of no contact from the studio, then the reporter who have given the report had made contact with them in the first place. They had said that there was a small private company in Atlas who produced sound cancelling equipment, normally for the use of rooms and audio recording devices. However, they saw this as a chance to get the companyís name out there, since she was on the news once already there was sure to be another news report would at least of some benefit.

So Akel and her father went to Atlas for a second time along with a news crew to film it. They didnít have the product available right then, but they were gathering data that would be used to get an idea for her level of hearing. They were aware that her hearing was sensitive, but her level of hearing was mind boggling. In a soundproofed room, she was able to hear the heartbeat of another person very clearly from one side of the room to the other. The task of making her a headset that could do have her hearing reduced to a normal faunus level became more difficult. They estimated that a whisper was akin to a tank firing right next to her ear, albeit they werenít able to find exactly how sensitive her hearing was. So with the data collected Akel, her father and the news crew back to Vale.

They had never said how task was going to be to Akel, since she took it as a promise and promises mean the world to a kid, especially at their age. As well as letting this hover over their company name, they persisted on and several months after Akel and co had gone home they had finally made a device which should be capable of giving her regular faunus level hearing.

The device mimicked the design of the crude version she had earlier, completely covering her faunus and human ears and had a few technological advantages over the earlier version: being part audio device and connected to her scroll which became useful from time to time.

So Akel continued her schooling with her fancy new headphones, being on the news a few times did make her a bit popular and gave her a larger friend group but she still remained closest to her friends that she made on the first day of school. She went through school with somewhat of an idea of what she wanted to be: Chef, Pilot or a Huntress were among the most appealing to her.

She ended up at her final decision when a trip into the good old attic which held a large chest, her dad brought down the chest with a bit of effort and they looked through the contents together, there were a few odd relics carefully organized and underneath a panel laid an unfinished prototype of an advanced looking weapon.

Akel linked it towards a huntress because they always had fancy looking equipment and this was no exception to that. One of the old pictures inside showed a picture of her mother as a teenager holding two of her friends underneath one arm each, smiling and having peace signs whilst the last member had his head in his hand in a disappointed face but looking like he was struggling to keep his composure, this made up her mind and she wanted to become a huntress.

Her father was a bit concerned with the idea of her becoming a huntress, but he wasnít going to stop her, just asking if she was sure that was what she wanted to do,  repeated nods and yes was the answer she gave.

Her father decided to bring this up with her motherís beacon team, they all showed positive support and would help however they would to help her become a great huntress like her mother was. They also opened up a bit about her mother when she was out doing huntress activities. She was a confident individual, always taking on the tough jobs that others would take hesitantly. They even told her that she wanted to learn the scythe because it was a challenge and she wouldnít stop until she mastered it. But she was indecisive about what to learn, the only scythe user that they were aware of was her mother. She also didnít want to favour one style over the other because she didnít want to pick favourites, so, without hesitating she said that she wanted to learn the three styles PLUS her motherís scythe style using what they knew about it.

They thought she was joking but they saw the very same burning passion in her eyes that they saw in her momís eyes whenever she wanted to do something. They gave a collective sigh and agreed in their own ways: one gave a thumbs up (Henry, sword user), another gave a small nod (Abagale, guns) and one poking her saying that she was going to be worked to the bone (David, martial artist and large knives). She didnít even waver for a moment but she probably wasnít aware of what they actually meant at that time.

So for two years before her official enrolment into Signal academy she underwent daily training, mostly with stamina based training and a bit of strength on the side to allow for an easier time when she would start to learn how to fight with proper weapons. She was trained with wooden versions and fist based martial arts first up. The sword because it was an easier weapon to learn for start and martial arts because being able to fight without a weapon is an important skill. Something they all practiced with varying degrees of proficiency.

Time passed by in a flash and she was already enrolled in Signal, she didnít have any friends from her preparatory school and she didnít have trouble making any new friends but she was a bit shy at first. Her white hair, different coloured eyes and slitted pupils did mean she had to be the one to engage in conversation first but she didnít let that dampen her quest to make new friends. Around this time there was a present at the door, a weapon which was sword, scythe and gun. A letter was attached but there was no sender, it read

ďI hope this letter finds you well Akeldama, apologies about the lack of detail in this letter. This weapon should serve you well as you train to become a great huntress. Hope to see you sometime in the future.
- AĒ

So she had a new group of friends, each learning their own style while she was learning several, the extra workload to make sure she didnít fall behind in practical abilities did mean she only had average scores in terms of anything that came towards subjects like english, math, science etc. She always got low Bís and high Cís and always got Aís in everything that came about for practical.

At age 14 she started to learn the scythe and the other half of Davidís style. She had help from David to craft weapons that would assist with his form of fighting and also decided on a pair of matching greaves because it would look better with matching gear. She was able to manage her workload better towards her last year which did give improvements to her grades and allowed her to pass with high Bís in theory wok with her standard Aís in practical which guaranteed her acceptance into Beacon.

Personality: At first glance Akel is a bit shy, especially around large crowds. Her early childhood was very remote and she still exhibits this when she isnít in conversation or a group that she knows well. To people that have known her for a bit she is seemingly regular caring individual. Her cheery nature can always bring a smile to anyone if she tries hard enough and wonít shy away from trying to bring a smile.

However she also expresses a very competitive nature, always wanting to be the best she possibly can be. This competitive part of herself goes hand-in-hand with her determined side, a great combination, having motivation behind wanting to best everyone. Regardless of the situation she isnít one to give up unless she knows that the situation is completely unwinnable. These traits were picked up from her mentors and have turned her into a bit of a fighting enthusiast. Much to the worry of her father.

Akel is also a very well managed person. She takes joy out of making sure everything's in order and everything is planned. Making sure everything is in order has allowed her to always keep on top of everything. This is by no means an obsession but merely a preference of her own personal lifestyle choices, because order is the enemy of chaos and chaos will bring the grimm.

As a leader Akel tries to be the best she can for her team. However, because they are in a team she expects that her teammates be aware of eachothers strengths and weaknesses. She will lecture them if they stuff up but is noticeably kinder on Primrose. This is because of her more timid nature and when compared to the two males in her team (Fallow Russet and Ace N. Thatoll). She tends to be a bit tough on them, Ace more so than Fallow: his somewhat sadistic nature does cause her to worry when he interacts with other people. As for Ace, Akel has been very watchful over him.

Aura and Semblance:
Aura colour: red

Akelís semblance allows for the manipulation of her aura in a condensed form to deal powerful strikes or creating objects either through further condensing and manipulation. She also could use a focusing object for her semblance which can form a solid object in proportion to the object that she is using or if an emergency calls for it: replicate weaponry using aura.

Akel typically uses it with charges of powerful strike, 4 to be precise. Using a large amount of condensed aura she can bring devastating damage upon a target. However she needs a weapon that is attuned with her aura to focus it, otherwise she can use her hands. However,  to summon a large attack charge with her hands takes time and isnít practical unless it is a dire circumstance.

Akelís other way of utilizing this is through the use of condensing her aura. Solidifying the aura into a construct rather than a fluid stream of damage. Used in Blood Drain to make altered blades and can created limited extension off of Blood Ignition. Creation by itself is limited, simple objects mostly. She can replicate her weapons but no dust or guns on them because it is too complicated at her current level. A worthy note with forming items is that she is unable to manipulate where it goes freely. She can however, do a simple stop and shove it in a different direction but that is the most she can do.

Her semblance turns the sclera of her eyes red with dark red bloodshot like pattern running through them, the sclera red colour will fade over a few seconds but the bloodshot veins can remain for half a minute.

Combat Behavior: Akel knows of a few combat styles, each one fitted to fit a certain fighting style and with a bit of flexibility depending on how her opponent is fighting. She will switch styles to best suit her current opponents weaknesses, or if she canít do that at least level the playing field a bit more. Akel tends to fight aggressively but can slow down to a more balanced role of defence and offense if she feels that her current pace of fighting can be used against her and would lead to a loss. If that isnít enough sheíll switch to a completely defensive stance.

When fighting she can also adjust the amount of sound going through. On the higher end (she can hear more), she is able to hear anything and everything around her with varying degrees of sensitivity. She can utilize echolocation with varying degrees of accuracy with the volume that her headset runs through to her ears. However, sufficiently loud noises can force her to bring the volume down to lessen this ability in favour of leveled hearing.

Her sensitive hearing has been used against her more than once. More so by knocking off her headset by an accidental strike. However she immediately becomes incapacitated by a sensory overload, this usually follows with a panic attack shortly after if she canít get them back on after a rough minute as the sound starts to disorientate her and will eventually send her into unconscious state. Learning many styles did take a toll on her overall skill, she isnít as skilled as a strict sword user and same goes for the rest of her weaponry. The complexity of the weapons does have a slower transformation time and does mean she needs to be careful when transforming, lest she be attacked in the middle of weapon transformations when she is vulnerable.

Akelís sword based style revolves around slash based attacks, getting in close while using her sword to make the enemies blade go away and at the same time deal a decisive strike. Mostly counter attacks and heavy strikes, a mostly human and faunus based fighting system designed against medium to large weapons and the subform to deal with projectile based attacks by use of an extended area for her to block the bullets with.
- Most proficient and practiced style.
- Can switch offense, balanced and defensive styles.
- Rotatable gun.
- Large blade allows makeshift shield.

The scythe is meant to be used against multiple weaker enemies or grimm. Making use of an extended reach and the design of the scythe to allow for a continuous streak of attacks without much pause. A difficult assault to halt unless the enemy is willing to risk damage either to their aura or themselves.
- A hard counter to grimm and weaker enemies.
- Can bypass front directed blocks
- Continuous attack.
- Obvious angle of attack.
- Fast enemies can provide difficult.

Martial art based combat designed to deal with enemies of a more heavy nature, not using a weapon like her main one will allow for her to get in close and dodge at the same time. She sticks to mostly straight punches but will use all of her hand-to-hand knowledge at her disposal and has easier control over her movements. This is because she doesnít have to move to compensate for her weapons length or weight. Especially in tight areas that would require small precision based movements.
- More maneuverability
- Martial art based style
- Canít block unless using the gauntlets

Blood Locks are weapons that are based off of short swords and are normally held between fingers with multiple at a time. Generally being used for puncture type attacks. Extending the grips will allow them to be used like short swords, usually in reverse grip. She can also throw them to perform various uses which she tends to come up on the spot. They can also serve as throwing weapons which she is quite skilled at, being able to throw them at an arc and behind her with no troubles at all.
- Work hand in hand with martial arts style.
- Semblance can allow for different types of blades to form.
-Throwing weapon.
-Not effective at blocking melee weapons unless in backwards grip.

WEAPON

Name: Blood Ignition

General Description: Blood Ignition main segments can be generalized into four main piece, blade 1, blade 2, handle and the shoulder of the blade. Blade one and two are done in silver. Featuring a large edge and have very tiny diagonal lines along it which show where the blade moves to form the scythe.The shoulder of Blood Ignition features a circular disc of gears that resemble the inner workings of a watch when the face is removed, done in dark blue, black and silver to match the colour scheme of her outfit.

The handle is done in dark blue and features two silver rings, one at the top and one at the bottom. These two rings are what control the transformations of the weapon by rotating the rings. Both rings are synced to eachother so when one moves so does the other. The handle can fit about three to four hands on top of one another. Lastly a thick handguard is present on the right side which also controls the direction that the barrel of the gun is facing on the shoulder, by pressing a button on the underside and pushing/pulling the guard towards the handle. It can spin in full rotations around the disc to shoot in any direction.

- Primary Form: Sword - Bringing the two blades about with 120cm with a 10cm gap in between to allow for blade catching, the handle is at itís regular length and a small gap between each of the blades left and right side. The handguard typically stays on the right side and normally faces outwards when in combat.
- Primary-Sub Form: Sub form changes the blade so the gap inbetween is no longer there. In doing so the shoulder of the blade can send weapon attacks along it off to the side away from her.

- Secondary Form: Scythe - The handle extends towards its full length, blade 1 forms the inside of the scythe blade and blade two will form the outside blade. The extension off of the handle can bend to a certain extent to allow for greater control when using the scythe. The scythe can use  little dust blade extensions off of the edge of both blades to give off a dust based effect.
- Secondary-Sub Form: the outer blade moves backwards slightly along blade 1. This creates a point in the back to use against enemies and the handguard splits and attaches to the back which keeps the piece in place. The movement a
also creates a small gap between the two blades to wedge the blade into places.

- Tertiary Form: Small Sword - The handle is detachable from the main weapon, this has the main part form a kind of sheath. The blades join and widen up a bit to allow the dust blades to centre and change with the small sword. It is activated from pressing
- Tertiary-Sub Form: Inserting the handle and using the silver ring will allow for the weapon to cycle through the blades in stock.

Ammunition / Dust Functions:
- Ammunition - Akel uses .223 hollow point rounds. Ideal for grimm due to no protective field like aura. She also carries a few tungsten based armour piercing rounds. However she rarely uses them because she rarely needs to destroy armour.

- Blades - Dust infused with metal to give a dust based blade. These form the edges of the blades and are only slightly visible because of it in sword/scythe form, but fully visible on the small swords.
- Fire - Releases fire based attacks in close range. Not very precise but can bypass a blade because of the area of attack.
- Ice - Forms ice upon contact, can freeze a limb and joint depending on where they are hit.
- Kinetic - Sends forth a large knockback based attack.

History: A weapon that was randomly dropped off at her house. Every single piece in the weapon was custom made and couldnít be tracked. The strangest thing was how it suited the styles that Akel was going to learn. Besides a few small alterations and maintenance she has done nothing else to it and doesnít plan to as it already was everything she ended up needing.

WEAPON

Name: Blood Lock

Primary Form: Small collapsible handles that hide in her sleeves. They are very small and carry a thin telescopic blade about 30cm long. They would break easily without aura to strengthen the blade to withstand blows. The handle can extend to be wielded with one hand.

Semblance Focusing: Akel can send her semblance through the hole for the blade. This allows her to replicate the regular blades that this can form and change up the blade to a limited extent. Things like a saw blade and hook on the end are usually what she makes.

History: Blueprints that came with Blood Ignition, the weapon wasnít made until her midway through her Signal training as readjusting them every now and then would of taken time.

WEAPON

Name: Blood Drain

Primary Form: A pair of gauntlets and by extension, gloves. The gauntlets release fire based attacks that Akel can infuse with her semblance for extra damage. The gloves are infused with ice dust to protect her hands from damage and prevent aura damage. She can also grab fire based weaponry for varying time depending on the heat of the weapon using the ice dust to counter.

Blood Lock combinations: The B.L are stored within the underside of Blood Drain. She can bring these out with a sharp flick of the wrist with up to 4 at max (she prefers 3). Also there is a small mechanism that keeps Blood Locks in place, so she doesn't have them slip out due to a heavy strike. Detachable at a moments notice to allow for throwing or one handed wielding.

History: Another set of blueprints that came with Blood Ignition, these were made a few months after starting Signal because she became proficient enough in hand to hand combat to warrant their creation.
« Last Edit: September 28, 2017, 11:29:34 PM by EdgeyReyes »
Spoiler: Atlas • show


Solaris Star - Atlesian Special Forces

Aegis Guard - First Year Atlas Student

Iris Ares - Fourth Year Atlas Student


Spoiler: Vale • show

Akeldama Blood-Heart - First Year Beacon Student

Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #1 on: December 14, 2016, 11:34:30 AM »
Sorry for the delay review...it seems like everyone is busy nowadays. Let's get started:

I'm actually not going to go too far into this review for one specific reason. Practically everything about this character is almost identical to Lady Maria in Bloodborne: her appearance nearly matches, semblance is exactly the same, combat behavior is also very close, and even her personality has some small traits. The only real significant difference in your character from Lady Maria is eye color and weapon.

With all that said, please look at the very first rule in Character Creation:

Quote
Originality. Don't copy characters created by others. This includes characters on this site, and characters from other sources. Create your own unique character. Alluding to a character or theme is acceptable.

Alluding to Lady Maria is fine, but this is practically copying her. This is why I'm not going to go further in this review until you make drastic changes to your character so it's no longer an almost exact copy of Lady Maria.
First Year Beacon Student: Rackley Winchester - The Hawkeye Sniper of Team CRSA (Crystal)

Second Year Beacon Student: Jett Davenport - The Playful Shadow Knight of Team MLDC (Melodic)

Third Year Beacon Student: Suntalia Lyn Ryker - The Voice of Thunder of Team SODR (Soldier)

Fourth Year Beacon Student: Savas Carnelian - The Quiet Berserker (Teamless)

Beacon Professor: Oberon Falcov - The Man With A Plan / Team Strategy Teacher of Beacon

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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #2 on: December 17, 2016, 09:31:54 AM »
So I decided to essentially rewrite every section as I was drawing/rewriting her. History wasn't touched and her physical appearance was slightly altered.

Most important key changes.
Drew her own outfit and made her appearance clear with the drawing.
Changed the second form to really just an extra attachment? piece? something of the sort for Blood Ignition.
Reworked and expanded on her semblance a bit to hopefully highlight the idea that I had in my head. Semblance is still going to need changes but I need the reviews to actually make headway.
Spoiler: Atlas • show


Solaris Star - Atlesian Special Forces

Aegis Guard - First Year Atlas Student

Iris Ares - Fourth Year Atlas Student


Spoiler: Vale • show

Akeldama Blood-Heart - First Year Beacon Student

Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #3 on: December 21, 2016, 02:33:24 PM »
Round two:

Semblance:
A few things here:
1. So, just to clarify this, but this basically sounds like a summoning semblance in which she summons a blood-like blade, right? I say this because the way you wrote it made it sounds a little bit confusing at first.
2. How long can she use it before she grows tired or needs to rest?
3. What are the drawbacks for using it for a prolong time? There needs to be a drawback to using it and/or strains on using it.
4. What does the lightning dust do to her weapon? You've indicated the fire and earth dust, but no the lightning.

Weapon:
Quite a few things here:
1.
Quote
Ignition can use the end of her scythe handle to pull out a ninjato, to which can become curved like a katana or keep its straight sword. Great because she can pull this out in either its primary form or its storage state.
How is the ninjato able to change between being curved or straight? Last I saw, metal does not bend unless a lot of heat is applied. Please either explain this further or make it so it's either curved or straight.
2.
Quote
TB uses dust through access to the large disc on both its side of the scythe
Who/What is TB?
3. Also, in regards to the dust function section: please explain exactly how far of a range each of the dust types have. Saying a medium area or large area can vary GREATLY depending on the user. Also, please list how many uses she gets with each dust type.
4. Lastly, having 58 throwing knives is going to be a problem. Doing the math, your looking at roughly 30lbs with those knives alone. That may not sound like a lot, but when you add that on top of everything else that she would be carrying, not to mention that her strength seems to be roughly average/above average, this is definitely going to slow her movements down. I suggest you cut that number in half to compensate the weight.

That should cover everything I can see.
First Year Beacon Student: Rackley Winchester - The Hawkeye Sniper of Team CRSA (Crystal)

Second Year Beacon Student: Jett Davenport - The Playful Shadow Knight of Team MLDC (Melodic)

Third Year Beacon Student: Suntalia Lyn Ryker - The Voice of Thunder of Team SODR (Soldier)

Fourth Year Beacon Student: Savas Carnelian - The Quiet Berserker (Teamless)

Beacon Professor: Oberon Falcov - The Man With A Plan / Team Strategy Teacher of Beacon

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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #4 on: December 21, 2016, 09:51:15 PM »
Fight!

So I did add all of the requirements for the semblance. I'm not sure if you want me to reword the semblance to make more sense or just a simple confirmation. So I'll say yes to your first point and reword it if you want me to.
I did add a side effect of pain, then physically damage in her wrists, temporal effects but I think it does limit the use of her semblance and gives her a consequence if she needs to use it more than her limit will allow.

With the weapon, I explained the lightning dust, took away the curved blade part and just made it become short or longer between 90 and 60cm. Added range for her shockwave and TB was the short name for its name original being "Tainted Blood" I just forgot to change that small part.

Lastly, I just put the throwing knives to 25 because that's easier to remember.
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Akeldama Blood-Heart - First Year Beacon Student

Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #5 on: December 21, 2016, 10:32:12 PM »
Looking good! Round Three now:

Semblance:
Quote
She can do a rough estimate of 20 large scale strikes at around 4% of her stamina
20 large scale strikes for only 4% is a lot for a first year student. I suggest you either increase the stamina cost or lower the strikes.

Other than that everything else looks good. Almost done :)
First Year Beacon Student: Rackley Winchester - The Hawkeye Sniper of Team CRSA (Crystal)

Second Year Beacon Student: Jett Davenport - The Playful Shadow Knight of Team MLDC (Melodic)

Third Year Beacon Student: Suntalia Lyn Ryker - The Voice of Thunder of Team SODR (Soldier)

Fourth Year Beacon Student: Savas Carnelian - The Quiet Berserker (Teamless)

Beacon Professor: Oberon Falcov - The Man With A Plan / Team Strategy Teacher of Beacon

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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2016, 10:41:13 PM »
I changed it to 5 strikes per 4%. I didn't get an indication of how much you wanted it to be altered so I just booped it at 5.
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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #7 on: December 22, 2016, 10:07:49 AM »
That works. The number can increase as she progresses in Beacon. Everything looks fine.

Approved 1 of 2.
First Year Beacon Student: Rackley Winchester - The Hawkeye Sniper of Team CRSA (Crystal)

Second Year Beacon Student: Jett Davenport - The Playful Shadow Knight of Team MLDC (Melodic)

Third Year Beacon Student: Suntalia Lyn Ryker - The Voice of Thunder of Team SODR (Soldier)

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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #8 on: December 22, 2016, 10:38:17 AM »
Just added her Beacon uniform, put urls to the full sized versions and made a minor edit to her clothing to do with the red jewel on her neck. Nothing important but just putting it out there.
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Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #9 on: December 23, 2016, 07:11:08 PM »
Approved


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #10 on: September 01, 2017, 11:10:20 PM »

CHARACTER

Name: Akeldama Blood-Heart

Age: 17

Species and Gender: Bat faunas, female   

Symbol: A red drop of blood with a bit of black mixed in

Occupation: 1st year student at Beacon

Appearance: Akeldama is just a bit below average at a height of 5í6, her stature is accompanied by incredibly messy unkept, silver whitish hair that reaches down to her ankles with it also covering the right side of her face. Her light skin and prominent fangs that can be seen even if she opens her mouth just a little bit, this gives her a bit of a strange nature if someone were to base her upon her looks, adding her bright gold eyes which seem to glow and stare through peopleís souls she can unnerve a lot of people extremely easily without meaning to do it and her eyes never seem to be fully open due to a nocturnal lifestyle, this seems to make her look a bit sinister with ill intent, yet seems to hold curiosity deep within past her soul-wrenching eyes. She has tattoos on the left side of her body as seen from her leg to the left side of her face. Her posture and usually regal nature seem to imply that she would be something supernatural high-class being, ya know, like a vampire, a last mention is that her smiles make her look super sinister, the tattoos are probably the reason why she looks sinister when smiling but she likes it.
Spoiler: Drawn by me - Sleeveless • show

Just a few notes
- Tried drawing fancy scarf and fedora... failed miserably
- Couldn't draw the rosaries
- Struggled with drawing the tattoos how I wanted, think of it as more cleanly done then represented in the picture.
Large version


Spoiler: Drawn by me - Sleeved • show


Huntress Clothing
Akel sticks to something that is excessively stylish, her clothing is almost a direct contrast to her own color scheme of her body, starting off with her white sleeveless turtleneck skin tight shirt and a red broocher-like piece of jewelry with a ruby and held in silver. Over that she wears a sleeveless silk black button up shirt. This is followed by a purple and gold vest then on top is followed with a black and dark blue vest, over that is a sleeveless black long coat (red on the inside) with gold crosses connected by a gold chain to keep the jacket around her and not flap against the wind so much. A gray, black and dark blue floral patterned scarf which drapes behind her back slightly goes down to her navel, she wears a bright purple and gold bandana tied loosely around her neck. She wears gray long pants with magnetic attachers on her right thigh, a brown leather belt with two belts crisscrossing and having her symbol where they crossover. Grey and maroon lace-up boots complete the ensembles main clothing. Last additions would be several silver chains with silver rosaries attached to the chains through a loop and rubies embedded in the center and the ends, last but not least, a black fedora with a gold band to complete the look.

She also has a version with sleeves for her skin tight shirt, button up and jacket for cold weather
Spoiler:  Definitely not drawn by me - This is a good idea of the scarf, chosen due to how fancy it looks • show


Beacon Uniform
Akel sticks to the regular school uniform, for the most part, she does wear her shoes from her huntress clothing, as well as the additions of her white turtleneck, magnetic holsters, and crisscrossing belts. She typically won't tie up her hair but might if she so wants.
Spoiler: Drawn by me • show


Formal Clothing
Usually just her sleeved combat uniform. Might wear a dress as long as it doesn't reveal much skin.

Casual Clothing
Casual attire is mainly consistent of over the shoulder tops and typically any combination of shorts, skirts, long pants for her legs and boots, sneakers or other types of footwear. Itís really the opposite of what she wears for her huntress activities.

History: Akeldama was born into a family of a single father because her mother died while giving birth, Akel was given her name because that was the name her mother had chosen beforehand thinking that she would inherit her red hair color. She didnít but got her fatherís silver hair which may have turned her into the butt of early hair loss jokes when in school. She actually didnít want to become a huntress first up and originally wanted to be a gymnast, however, she set herself on this path when her father had recovered a very old chest which contained the broken of the soon to be reforged Tainted Rose and a black and gray scarf. Inside the chest contained details of why she gave up that life after meeting Akelís father and decided that he would be the one she would start a family with.

When she had gotten into Signal she did get a bit of teasing from the other students but nevertheless she would be able to shrug most things off without thought. With her time in Signal, she actually made quite a large amount of friends, got her motherís weapon reforged using pictures of her mother and her team plus adding a few adjustments, mainly the swords onto the second form and the dust disc. Also, a noteworthy of joy for her was that the hair jokes died down when she turned sixteen because her hair was very thick.

Now she completed her Signal training and was able to get into Beacon with fair results, as a gift her father had got a special outfit made for her using some ideas from her motherís style of clothing to which she accepted. So far she has been able to keep her color blindness secret to everyone except for family.

Personality: Akeldamaís personality is a really sweet girl from the moment that people meet her, she is almost angelica, she is kind, sweet friendly and a good source of comfort to those that need it. Always having an overly sweet smile even in the most dangerous of situations. Akel is sweet but that doesnít mean she will take crap from anyone, if she is insulted she will respond verbally unless there is a good reason why she shouldnít. She can become very verbal if she gets really ticked off but usually will try to show great restraint in her language.

Besides that she is really easy to get along with, she likes to socialise and is by no means an outcast, she doesnít mind showing her tattoos off and is quite proud of them despite their simplicity, Some noteworthy things to note is her particular dislike of heat, she canít really handle the hot weather and generally enjoys the cold a lot more, most of her hobbies are more so just small pastimes: reading, video games sometimes and learning general skills that she can use for herself such as cooking tend to take up her time when not training or studying.

Aura and Semblance: Blood blade
Aura colour: Red

Akeldamaís semblance is in relation to her name, her name meaning ďfield of bloodĒ, while she canít summon a field of blood it does allow her to ďcreateĒ a blade. It isnít blood but rather just the color of her aura playing into effect which makes it looks like blood. The actual ability of her semblance creates a ďflowing bladeĒ in her aura color, carrying the form of a liquid but being as deadly as a sharpened blade. Her semblance is meant to be pure offensive but with careful movements and proper consideration can be used defensively.

When she uses her semblance it causes the ďbloodĒ to form in the air around her, she can roughly control where it will form but she canít make it super concentrated because she is still learning, when her semblance activates her eyes and hair will turn red. Plus her blade will also glow red, this is due to the fact that she uses the weapon as a controller for the direction of the weapon. Because she uses the scythe is goes in sharp arcs just like the angle of the blade. Using a large blade would make the semblance move as if it were in a line, just like the shape of the actual blade she is using.

Without weapons to use it upon her attacks become omnidirectional, she can control how far it goes but not the direction, bad if she is working with friends, good if she is by herself. Her semblance is most useful with large targets in mind, humans to machines to Grimm. Anything that is large is nice and easy prey for her.

She uses fire, lightning and earth dust foci, she identifies them by the position on her belts with fire taking the left side of each belt, lightning taking the right side of her bottom belt and earth taking top belt on her right. Nevertheless, the addition of fire to her semblance can cause extra harm to her opponents and earth will make the blood harden and is normally used to create spikes to just make an enemy's life all the more difficult.

When using the foci catalyst, the front of her semblance slashes will be her regular blade, followed closely by the desired effect of the foci that she has enlisted with. If her semblance isnít fast enough or the timing is off it will cause her semblance to be engulfed by the dust before she can strike her target. These foci are single uses and when used will be nothing but a small empty capsule after use. She holds 30 fire, 15 earth, 15 lightning.

She can do a rough estimate of 5 large scale strikes at around 4% of her stamina. Definition of large would be when she uses the most against her larger targets. Besides the take on her stamina, it can also cause harm to herself if used too often in a short amount of time. Generally a small pain becomes apparent in her wrist after around 4 uses in a minute, if she were to go over temporary damage forms at her wrist, her aura can repair the damage given that she stops using her semblance for about 30 seconds.



Combat Behavior: Akeldama, if not obvious from her clothing is based around elegance, from her stance to even little movements can be shown to hold a certain refinement and almost classy style. She wields her scythe using fluent attacks designed to keep enemies within her scythe range, yet keep them out of their own weapons range if she has the greater reach. She will use her scythe to hook enemies and keep them off balance to keep the fight in her favor. Keeping the enemy close to her means she doesnít have to worry about her color blindness making the enemy blend in with the environment. With this, she fights very aggressively, the idea that the best defense is a good offense and not giving them time to think for even a second. She prioritizes the larger targets and will generally try to keep smaller targets away or try to deal with them swiftly.

Using the sword she will keep it in her dominant hand and usually hold her scythe against her hip in its storage form or keep it in its regular form if she thinks it will be more useful.

Onto her weaknesses: She is colour blind, only having the colour red registers within her eyesight, possibilities of the specific colour might be due to her aura colour being the same colour, however, this means she canít tell the difference between bright green and bright blue as examples, to her it will appear as the same whitish shade, environments will naturally hide her enemies because of this and unless they wear red to which case she can spot them very easily, it will all appear in shades of grey, white or black. While not using guns she doesnít really seem troubled by it unless the distance is very long range. Without her scythe or throwing knives, she has trouble fighting unless she utilizes her semblance to do damage so she always tries to keep her weapon in her hands at all times and will even back off if she thinks she could be disarmed. Her agility makes her a difficult target but disrupting her flow can make her easier to fight since she relies on fluent and seamless movements to use both her scythe and her semblance effectively.

WEAPON

Name: Blood Ignition

Primary Form: A red, black and white scythe that is longer than herself when put next to her. Mainly black and white and uses small red detailing on things like engravings, the blade is quite large and has a circular disc on the face located directly above the center scythe blade and the handle crossover. The discs have red runic type writing which allows her to distinguish the dust types visually due to her inability to distinguish colors except for red.

Secondary Form: Ignition can use the end of her scythe handle to pull out a straight katana, this can be at its full length of 90cm for the blade and 15cm for the handle, alternately the blade can go to 60cm to form a proper sized ninjato.

Storage Form: The scythe just folds up into a rectangle with a cylinder handle being seeable in the area where it looks like she removed a small rectangle near one of the corners. Attaches to the magnetic grips on her right thigh

Dust Functions: Blood Ignition uses dust through access to the large disc on both its side of the scythe. Access to four elements and can engage a separate dust type on each disc allowing for two separate elements to be active on the scythe at any one time. The distance of the shockwave attacks is a 2 meter radius. Each disc slot is able to hold 7 charges for each dust type.

Scythe
Lighting - Lighting causes the blade to arc electricity, usually for making an enemy have s small electrical spasm, slamming it into the ground causes a somewhat medium range electrical burst, a modification keeps the burst from going in the direction of the angle in a small cone.
Fire - Fire coats the blade of the scythe in flames, used as a repellent to keep foes away as well as attack and can slam into the ground for a similar attack to the lightning. Not really good since she hates the heat but canít deny its effectiveness.
Ice - Ice makes items freeze from contact with the blades touch, usually used to target key areas and give herself an opening, slamming into the ground causes a thin sheet of ice to form over a large area, area of effect is 8 meter radius. Alternately she can use it with fire and ice to create a large amount of mist upon slamming the ground.
Kinetic - Kinetic allows for more knockback to add to her hits. Much like fire and lightning, she can slam the scythe into the ground to cause a shockwave of the element.

History: Blood Ignition was initially a scythe that her mom had used during her huntress days. After her passing they discovered the old chest to which she kept it in. Akel now uses it in her memory to get a sense of connection with the parent that she would never be able to know, happily carrying on her motherís legacy with pride through her weapon. The sword was added in since it required very little modification and didn't compromise the weapon in any way.

WEAPON

Name: Throwing Knifes

Primary Form: Throwing knives which by default donít have the blade visible, tucked into the hilt until she grabs them from her belt to throw them. In this form, they look like decorations on her belt to separate the dust catalyst. She doesnít use her semblance on it because she uses these as pure throwing weapons and has found it hard to control her semblance when using these without contact, however in hand, she can use her semblance to a small extent.

Secondary Form: The blade extends out of the hilt. Nothing special but does save space and allows her to carry a sum total of 25 knives without them interfering with her movement because of there placement.

History: Just small extra weapons to throw at enemies, nothing special.



U Edit Now


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EdgeyReyes

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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #11 on: September 02, 2017, 09:10:49 PM »
- Added themes
- Heterochromia eyes (red and gold)
- Is now an actual faunus (bat ears)
- Changed hairstyle
- Changed outfit(s)
 History - revised, altered, large section before Signal.
Personality - expanded on. Included on how she acts to her teammates.
Semblance - revised, cleaned, basing it off of "condensed aura" and other way to use it off of this concept.
Combat behaviour - Reflecting new weapon (s). Each style seperately.
- Weapon(s) Scythe/Sword/Rifle/Short sword (for consistency between thread where she uses it.
- Extended blades/makeshift claw weapons.
- Guantlets/Martial arts weapons

Any opinions/grammar/clarifications do message me through discord. It's faster that way. Cheers m8(s)
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Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #12 on: September 03, 2017, 10:22:57 PM »
Update~
Third paragraph of combat behaviour (weaknesses). Yeah I did that.
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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #13 on: September 28, 2017, 11:40:37 PM »
So I think I got everything that was mentiomed from the ccq board
Changes include
- different symbol (my own choice)
- added data on semblance regarding forming of objects
- edit on history which indicates the level of her hearing (open to adjustment.)
-editing of weaknesses
I can't remember the rest because they were either small or non-important (sorry)
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Aegis Guard - First Year Atlas Student

Iris Ares - Fourth Year Atlas Student


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Akeldama Blood-Heart - First Year Beacon Student

Linh Li "Mythos Laurenstine - Second year Beacon Student


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Re: Akeldama Blood-Heart
« Reply #14 on: October 15, 2017, 08:51:11 AM »
Heya Edgey. Sorry for the delay in approving the edits, however as they include some pretty large changes we've agreed that the best way to move forward is to put the profile over in CC again and then we'll do a group review soon(ô).