Author Topic: Amane Petrichor  (Read 1364 times)

Inexhaustive

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #15 on: March 29, 2018, 03:51:11 PM »
Okay, I'm done. Here are added changes:
  • Added middle name because adopted
  • Fixed semblance section
  • Added use of throwing stars to her combat behavior.
  • Made her motorcycle more specific
  • Replaced Mustang 429 Boss with Equus 770 Bass
  • Added a weapon history to her primary weapon
  • Minor image size reduction
« Last Edit: March 29, 2018, 05:37:59 PM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #16 on: March 29, 2018, 05:53:12 PM »
I'm not sure if throwing stars curve considering applying any degree of over or under spin would mean it's far more likely to hit the target flat side but it's not too big a deal.

reapproved.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #17 on: April 09, 2018, 02:34:41 AM »
Pre edits: ShowHide
CHARACTER

Name: Amane Mathoera Petrichor

Age: 18

Species and Gender: Human and Female

Occupation: First Year Student at Beacon, Explorer

Appearance: Amane is 164cm tall, weighs 45kg, and has light skin. She has shoulder length blonde hair and amber eyes.

While Amane mixes and matches her apparel, her clothing of choice in the field consists of a dark grey weather resistant peacoat over a black polo shirt, dark brown jeans, a black beanie on her head, black moto boots, a dark brown scarf, a luxury watch on her left wrist, and a backpack with various supplies.

She does not make any modifications to her uniform unless its for things like weather conditions, but always wears her watch.

Amane also has a collection of expensive men’s colognes, which she wears interchangeably.

[spoiler=Appearance]

Watch: ShowHide


History: Amane was born in Vale to two prestigious scientists who were on the verge of discovering something amazing until they were killed by a car bomb. She was taken in by her friend Iris, whose family also consisted of wealthy scientists. Amane and Iris grew up together and as the years passed, Iris was invited to a school for highly gifted scientists.

Seeing her sister and best friend moving up in the world, Amane resolved to do something too. However, she felt being a scientist wasn’t for her, especially after digging into her parents’ past and finding out that they weren’t the best of people. She still wanted to be somebody who helped people and made their lives better though, so she decided to become a huntress and signed up for Signal Academy with support from her family.

Even before discovering her semblance, Amane was really low-key and didn't like to attract attention, but was an excellent student who put in a lot of effort to train and study, even attending an extracurricular class to learn aura detection. However, she would slightly downplay her skills and never do anything flashy during demonstrations and duels, only getting passing scores so she doesn’t attract attention. After she discovered her semblance, she was even less there in the minds of others.

After graduating from Signal, Amane took an year off to work in the field, collecting lab samples for Iris, who graduated early and was immediately hired to work at a laboratory. This year for Amane consisted mostly of exploring ruins, but due to the nature of her semblance and the advantages it provides, there were also a few grey areas connected with Vale’s criminal underworld and the black market. Eventually though, Iris pushed her to go to Beacon so she can make friends other than Iris and finish her training to become a fully-fledged huntress.

Personality: Amane is a very grounded person who never panics and likes to thinks things through. She's also highly perceptive, good at collecting information, and willing to delve into morally grey areas. Being an introvert, she doesn't talk a whole lot and tries to stay away from the center of attention, but can still make conversation with others. Despite being somewhat withdrawn though, she does have a slight humorous side and tends to make jokes occasionally..

Amane is also someone who lives life to a high standard while staying out of her comfort zone. She likes playing racing games, listening to house music, working on or riding her motorcycle, drinking scotch, and occasionally smoking a cigar or weed. She dislikes greasy food and public restrooms.

Aura and Semblance: Aura Color: Invisible | Abilities: Detection
Semblance: People will forget what Amane looks like if they don’t see her for twelve hours. She also doesn’t appear on camera. While this ability is passive and cannot be controlled, those who knew her before her semblance was activated can remember what she looks like. One drawback of her semblance is that it slows down her aura regeneration by 30%.

Combat Behavior: Amane is someone who fights with pure precision and efficiency. Highly skilled at controlling her rifle and aiming in a short time frame, she can land two to the chest and one to the head within a single three round burst from thirty meters away. Her movements are devoid of anything extra as she moves around with agility, her reactions are impressive, and she’s great at strategy and decision-making in the spur of the moment. Her environmental sense is also a major asset, which she uses on top of her aura detection to predict enemies and hit various “oddshots”. With her throwing stars, Amane uses them very strategically and is able to throw them in curved trajectories.

However, Amane is very lightweight and not the strongest person out there so in a match of physical strength, many people can overtake her. She also lacks short term stamina and defensive aura capacity, which gives her trouble with drawn out short-distance battles and makes her a glass cannon. Finally, Amane doesn’t have much experience working in a team, but she understands this and is willing to cooperate with team members.

Techniques: ShowHide


Holding Angles - Amane likes to hold enemy bottlenecks from covered firing positions, attempting to angle herself to narrow down the gap to get it around 200-300cm wide. Because of the narrow gap to shoot through, Amane’s fast reactions come into play here in order to mow down any enemies passing through the bottleneck.
[spoiler=Example]


One-Tap - AP rounds are expensive. Despite using an automatic rifle, Amane prefers to terminate enemies with one round to the head whenever the opportunity is presented.

Prefiring - Amane is one who acts instead of reacts. Using the pings from her aura detection along with her environmental senses to deduce areas with a high chance of enemies, Amane keeps her gun pointed at where they are most likely to pop out, and can immediately fire at areas she knows where enemies are, even if she hasn’t seen them. Because of Amane’s trigger discipline however, there is usually a fifty millisecond delay for her to confirm that it is in fact an enemy.

Recoil Control - Amane not only has an excellent grip and stance to improve the grouping of her shots, she controls it with a fine level of precision, allowing the recoil deliver her line of fire to the next target. She mainly uses this for hitting a target’s head right after hitting its chest.

Spray Transfer - Amane is highly capable of changing targets without letting go of the trigger. Against two enemies placed about ten meters away and a maximum distance of three meters apart from each other, Amane is able to terminate the first one with her automatic rifle, then accurately turn to target the other within the .125 second interval of a next bullet being chambered.

Triple-Burst Failure to Stop - Amane’s signature technique, her version of failure to stop that is executed within a single three round burst from her automatic rifle. The first shot is either placed in the targets center of gravity near its navel, or on one side of its sternum. If placed in the center of gravity, she controls the recoil of her gun to let it instantly place the next shot to the target’s sternum. If the first shot is placed on one side of the sternum, she grounds the recoil to place the next shot in the other side of the target’s sternum. With the purpose of the first two shots being to stop the target in its tracks, Amane once against uses the recoil of her gun to place the third shot into the target’s “T-Zone” to turn off its lights. Amane is capable of doing this to enemies up to 30m away[/spoiler]
Techniques (Not ready for field use yet!): ShowHide

Cross Termination - "A group of enemies should not be seen as individuals, but a single group to be flowed through."
Somewhat a more advanced version of Spray Transfer, Cross Termination is a technique to use against tight groups of enemies where the user doesn’t let go of the trigger of an automatic weapon, but controls it, making every single bullet deliver a headshot to a different enemy. Amane needs to practice this technique a little more before it is ready to use in the field.

Crippling - “If you can’t find a weak point, make one.”
With Beacon Academy comes tougher, tankier enemies in the future. Amane developed this technique in preparation of that, which involves firing at certain kinematic weak points at the right times to cripple their movement, for example, the fulcrums of any strenuous actions the enemy might be performing, or even their center of gravity. Due to it being recently developed, Amane is not ready to use this in the field yet.


Equipment

Primary Weapon: A powerful automatic rifle with a silencer, holographic smart scope, foldable stock, and a strap for easy carry. It has a twenty-round magazine Amane loads with armor-penetrating bullets (Each one costing the equivalent of 2$), and she also carries two spares. The rifle is capable of medium-range sniping.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Weapon History: As someone with a preference for practicality, Amane started out with an ordinary rifle and slowly customized it to fit her use case the best. During her one year absence, Amane came across a shipment of armor piercing rounds from a seller in the black market which she completely bought out (selling Iris's McLaren to do so), both because she didn't want unsavory criminals getting their hands on them and also because they complimented her fighting style really well.

Secondary Weapon: Desert Eagle Mark XIX

Tertiary Weapon: Tactical Bowie Knife

Throwables: 3x tactical throwing stars, which can be either a flashbang, high explosive, incendiary, or smoke.

Backpack: Climbing gear, various lab sample-collecting equipment/supplies, flares, compact multi-tool (pliers, tweezers, awl, wire cutter, various shape screwdrivers, coarse and fine files, scissor, can opener, serrated blade, bottle opener), compass, flashlight, duct tape, steel wire, pens, lighter, water purification tablets, mirror, thermal blanket, lockpick set, compact parachute, first aid kit, bobby pins, two tourniquets, scroll and earbuds, and a water bottle.

Vehicles:
Amane usually gets around on her black Ducati Panigale 1199 S motorcycle with an installed Termignoni racing exhaust system.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Amane drives her black Equus 770 Bass when she doesn't feel like riding her motorcycle.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Occasionally, Amane will also borrow one of Iris's cars to drive around:

Aston Martin 2018 Vantage
Color: Silver
Description: Fast and great for travelling in style, Iris purchased this car with her family’s money.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Range Rover Velar
Color: White
Description: A great car for travelling with company and going on road trips, the Range Rover Velar is spacious, powerful, and great at off-roading. Iris bought this from money she earned as a professor.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Mercedes E63 AMG (Alpha7 Performance Kit)
Color: White
Description: A comfortable, durable car that doesn’t attract much attention. After Amane installed a BiTurbo performance package, it became a monster capable of going from zero to sixty mph in under three seconds without compromising comfort.
Spoiler: ShowHide

Residence:
Amane also bought a spacious high level suite in Vale with money inherited from her parents, where she likes to get work done in or relax and spend time alone.
Spoiler: ShowHide
[/spoiler]
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

Calen Shrike - ASTC - First Year Beacon.

Saffron de Cortez - SALT - Third Year Atlas.

Amarant Lovis - (formerly of)ACCE - Headmaster of Atlas Academy

Ramalia - RASB - First Year Shade

Inexhaustive

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #18 on: April 09, 2018, 01:27:19 PM »
Finished making following changes:
  • (Age) Her birthday is on 4/20
  • (Appearance) She speaks with an English accent but can do an American one
  • (History) She occasionally volunteers for the fire brigade from time to time as someone trained not only to protect the ground teams from Grimm, but also terminate burning animals in order to prevent them from running around panicked and spreading the fire.
  • (Semblance) Upped aura regeneration reduction to 50%.
  • (Equipment) Upped her spare magazines to 3
  • (Equipment) Added that she'll occasionally carry more powerful explosives if the situation calls for it, such as breaching charges or remote mines.
  • (Equipment) Made her throwing stars just HE and added the special ones as normal grenades.
  • Some wording and grahamer fixes
« Last Edit: April 09, 2018, 02:23:43 PM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #19 on: April 09, 2018, 04:40:10 PM »
Oh i thought you where joking about this. OK well lke our world it is likely that there are mutiple fire teams each given a region to patrol which would make Amane's local one pretty urban. This would mean there was almost no danger of grimm in the city of Vale itself, if Amane volenteers for a more further away one then she is unlikely to ever be called upon given; the distance, Amane's other committments, and fire fighters remalying on teamwork which they and Amane simply dont have time to develop.

I'm 99% sure fire fighters dont have a marksman to kill animals in any country.

Amane could be part of a volenteer fire fighting service but they are often exclusively rural and do support stuff like pre burning and what not. I'd also like a bit on how the semblance thing plays out.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

Calen Shrike - ASTC - First Year Beacon.

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #20 on: April 09, 2018, 05:16:35 PM »
Took it out.

Also added into Personality that despite her willingness to go around the law, Amane advocates government infrastructure and “the system”, believing that a smoothly flowing civilization greatly increases humanity’s chances of survival.
« Last Edit: April 09, 2018, 05:50:42 PM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #21 on: April 09, 2018, 06:25:54 PM »
I'd like a little more delving into the innate hypocrisy of advocating for government infrastructure while going out of her way to undermine it with the black market stuff.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #22 on: April 10, 2018, 02:08:06 AM »
Amane understands that this could be considered hypocritical and while she believes it’s important to establish a code to live by, she’s too grounded to consider it (or anything else) sacred. Nothing is ever black or white and everything depends on the situation. Amane trusts only herself and no one else to make the right decisions and act in the best interests for the ‘good guys’. If she knew somebody else who wanted to sink into this way of life, she wouldn’t stop them but she would recommend against it and give them proper warnings. If that somebody were close to her and they had a reason to get into the underground, she would rather take care of it for them than have them dirty their hands.

Also, Amane doesn’t go out of her way to undermine the law, but some of the things she is tasked to retrieve are difficult or impossible to obtain completely legally. When she happens upon armaments on the black market that catch her interest, one of the main reasons for her to buy them is to prevent them from ending up in the hands of criminals and terrorists, plus the fact that she can use them for herself also helps too.

Finally, Amane enjoys the feeling of power. Living a shadowy underground life as society drifts around her makes her feel like a wolf amongst sheep and government infrastructure keeps the system going, which is another reason she advocates for it.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2018, 04:23:33 AM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #23 on: April 10, 2018, 04:39:36 AM »
I'd like some degree of this detailed in the profile. Also the whole 'she is buying them so others don't' isn't how markets, even illegal ones work. She is contributing to a system which if it is anything like ours ties her up in the slave and drug trades stimulating that flow of resources. The more money she gives arms dealers the more money they have buy even more guns and expand their businesses. I'm not saying Amane can't think like this I just want you to know it isn't very well thought out and would very easily end with her being bfto'ed if she ever tried to defend her position.

Also if she is willing the commit criminal acts to gain a slight edge, special atlas rounds instead of whatever hunters-in-training are provided, that does set the bar pretty low. Would she cheat in a 1v1 fight? Well more than she is already I suppose.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

Calen Shrike - ASTC - First Year Beacon.

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #24 on: April 10, 2018, 05:19:22 AM »
I put the first paragraph in Personality.

You might think that's the case, but the merchandise has already been acquired and it's going somewhere. Plus, this allows Amane to work her way deeper into the market. Also, her habits come from her experiences, and (luckily) the people she's met in the underworld weren't all scum.

In a 1v1 fight where there was such a thing as cheating, Amane would actually downplay her abilities and lose on purpose in order to learn her opponent without giving them information on her own abilities. If she doesn't feel the need to learn her opponent, she'll try to avoid the fight but if unavoidable she'll still downplay her abilities. If she feels she has learned enough from her opponent and can still find a way to beat them without revealing her abilities, she'll do so.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2018, 05:23:17 AM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #25 on: April 10, 2018, 05:38:50 AM »
The arms dealers may have acquired the ammo already but they don't make a profit until it's sold and Amane provides another bidder allowing them to increase the price or simply cover any short fall if the normal buyers are broke/arrested/taking a break/doing other kinds of work/etc. Also how is she working her way deeper into the market if everyone forgets her after 12 hours?

Likewise what exactly is the purpose of studying others and losing on purpose? Competitions like the Vytal festival are played up to be basically the Olympics so throwing would be unusual.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #26 on: April 10, 2018, 06:22:43 AM »
They only forget her appearance so she can still use other means. Even so, she only works with a few people who she knows aren't complete scumbags and knows she can trust enough to not compromise her. Amane isn't a bidder when it comes to purchasing black market stock, once she catches wind of it from either information brokers, her network, or herself, she goes right after it before its up for sale and negotiates with the supplier, offering a more discreet transaction and what they believe to be more profitable than what they earn after market or auction commissions. Because she's a repeat customer to few sellers, they may also procure/create things for her on request.

In an event as major as the Vytal Festival, Amane would try not to participate, only willing if her team absolutely needed it. There's just too many people watching. She studies others because she's not interested in winning as much as she cares about staying a step ahead of those in the same field whom she may be working with or possibly against in the future.
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #27 on: April 10, 2018, 08:48:35 AM »
OK just to summaries what we talked about on discord and what we have discussed here.

You want Amane to get to the point where she can walk into certain black market store fronts and receive her shipments as well as having enough knowledge of these shipments to buy them before others have a chance. Although I am resistant of this as a concept as it implies weapon smuggling is a lot more organised than a super militarised state like Atlas would allow I understand what you are going for. Personally I see two ways forward
  • 1). Contacts with a major local supplier means Amane get's first dibs on whatever comes in. In return Amane provides off the books tasks, strictly no questions asked. She is still apart of a criminal network which contributes to the slavery of thousands of people but can justify it anyway she wants.
  • 2). Relying more on the sister angle perhaps she can trade some of her hard to find technology to a less reputable Atlas one in exchange for weapons. 'Giving her little sister the edge she needs' or whatever assurances so they aren't being used to take over the world.

There is a lot of stuff you can do with the underworld elements, from basis of missions to inter-team conflict and if that is what you are going for then great. If it is just to get shiny bullets it probably won't be worth it.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

Calen Shrike - ASTC - First Year Beacon.

Saffron de Cortez - SALT - Third Year Atlas.

Amarant Lovis - (formerly of)ACCE - Headmaster of Atlas Academy

Ramalia - RASB - First Year Shade

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #28 on: April 10, 2018, 03:17:23 PM »
Okay, I just turned it over and took out most of the black market stuff. She still has gone into the exotic parts of it from time to time but not much. Her experimental rounds come from some contacts within the weapons department of the company she works at. I still kept her whole moral paradox and imperfect philosophies in her personality but I removed some of it.

Other things I added:
  • (Appearance) Added that her Beacon database picture is just a grey placeholder figure
  • (Combat Behaviour) Added that she likes to shoot things that are lined up.
  • (Equipment) Added a Five-seveN with a suppressor.
« Last Edit: April 10, 2018, 09:15:29 PM by Inexhaustive »
Explorer / Beacon First Year / Enigmatic Aimbot of Team CASA (Casanova): Amane Petrichor - "Win your battles before they're fought."

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Re: Amane Petrichor
« Reply #29 on: April 10, 2018, 09:59:08 PM »
Well there is anything wrong with this but I feel you should be aware of how 'un-rwby' the character is becoming but that isn't enough to stop reapproval.
No criticism is too harsh so hit me with your best shot.

Calen Shrike - ASTC - First Year Beacon.

Saffron de Cortez - SALT - Third Year Atlas.

Amarant Lovis - (formerly of)ACCE - Headmaster of Atlas Academy

Ramalia - RASB - First Year Shade