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Messages - Xarias Fury

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1
Approved Characters / Re: Coconut Cream
« on: April 06, 2018, 08:38:48 AM »
AppppppppppproveD

2
The Ursa whimpered as both of its legs got attacked from the sides, one by Topaz and another by Airi. With a large crash, the beast fell onto some crates, knocking them aside while struggling against the wire wrapped around its leg. Whilst still tied, the beast struggled under its own weight and lack of support from its now smoking leg and roared in defiance as it tried yanking against Airi's wire to free itself.


Almost wriggling free, the Ursa yanked one more time with enough force to knock Airi off balance if she wouldn't let go, and managed to plant the wire caught leg back up. It took a swipe at Topaz, missing completely as it stumbled on one injured leg, and tried again, only to get a face full of nevermore from above while Vivian landed towards its head. Several more flying grimm were taken down by Sheer's burst with a joint barrage by the remaining Atlesian Knights and the birds dispersed leaving but a few stragglers and one very angry ursa on the ground.

Peeking out from one of the cars near the back of the train, a man in a white cropped suit with red hair observed the fight with interest and shooed away a small nevermore with a small slap of his hand. He pulled out a scroll not a moment later and deactivated the remaining Atlesian Knights, prompting them to curl down after marching back into the car, despite some of them still getting assaulted by small grimm.

"Good good. That's what you huntsmen are for. Though I do have to say your efficiency leaves some...area for improvement." He said, arms set back as he strutted towards the ursa. Spotting Vivian in the air, he took a few steps back and checked his watch. Almost as if he were timing the end of the encounter.

________________________________________________________________________________

Professor William Nox observed the rather coincidentally coordinated attempt by the quad of huntsmen-in-training and grumbled something about his tools lying all over the train car. There wasn't much left for him to do but tidy up as the kids would probably take care of the ursa any moment now, though that left him to wonder what started the grimm attack in the first place. Whatever it was it wasn't exactly his area of expertise so he started browsing his scroll for more info about the train while several of his 0ddb0ts started cleaning up, one of the drone versions sparking at the joints as it moved.

Crimson Express. Yadda yadda, same stuff as before. Unfortunately digging deeper into the databases wasn't his speciality so he gave up the search and instead have a bot fly out the window to sirvey the train.

________________________________________________________________________________

Ducking back behind the car Kei hid as the white-suited man appeared. He looked important enough to be familiar with the people on board and observant enough to see through a disguise. She cursed her luck as she siddled back into the engineering section of the train and could hear murmurs about an odd fast moving object coming from the front of the train. It was still a ways away but no further info was spoken as some engineers scrambled back to their stations as a large mechanical groaning echoed through the car.

__________________________________________

3
Approved Characters / Re: Prism Skylark
« on: March 16, 2018, 06:43:00 AM »
Lookin good

Approved

4
Approved Characters / Re: Sveo Zi-Eun
« on: March 16, 2018, 06:20:54 AM »
Approved

5
The train shook violently as Ursa roared in response to Topaz's attacks, slamming its paws into the ground. The arrows were mere annoyances as they hit hard bone instead of flesh and seemed to anger it rather than do much damage. That was good though, it stopped flinging robots and crates off and turned instead to the students, some of the nevermore following suit while a few dropped to a barrage of bullets from the back. The large bear-shaped grimm scrambled towards the kids with fire in its eyes while flinging a dust cart with a massive swipe of its paw right at the archer girl. 

Some of the Atlesian knights leaped onto the top of the earlier train car and began firing at the small fry, dropping beowolves and flying grimm like gnats, but occasionally got knocked down as well. The amount of grimm was quickly being diminished but the Ursa remained along with several small flying nevermore which darted towards the students like vultures at a carcass, one of the birds getting knocked out of the sky by the flying crate that headed towards the dust car while a few others attacked Sheer as he popped out of his hatch.

Nox was busy scrambling to fix his bots as the mess outside happened and an audible curse could be heard as the shaking car dropped a few of his tools on the ground.

*          *          *

As the fight went on Kei continued her prying, looking for hints as to what would cause the White Fang to target this particular train. It didn't seem to have more than the standard amount of dust, from what she researched, but it was quite heavily armed with robots for a simple train. Were they upping security for the dust? Or was there another reason...perhaps having something to do with the number of grimm attacking...She needed more info.

Kei watched as the students continued their fight, a look of boredom on her face. Grimm were boring and predictable to say the least but at least the train proved to be a tricky environment. Dust carts here and there, limited space, the chance of falling off and tumbling to the side like a log down a hill, maybe even a derailing. She had to get to the car at the back but the grimm blocked her way. She wouldn't want to join the fight just yet, being as crammed as it was now, so she held back but not without keeping a hand nestled near her yo-yo.

6
A slight mechanical whirring was audible across several of the gears across Aurum's Silver Tanhelm as he yanked back the daggers that spread the ice and neatly assimilated them back into the complicated contraption. The water seemed to all but stop but that didn't satisfy Topaz, who was busy hacking away at the stone that jutted into the ship. Not too long after she was finished Aurum let go of his bubble and sighed as the mild exhaustion took its toll.

Using Golden Time as long as he did wasn't something too rare of a circumstance for him but the size he had to manage while wading in ice-cold water gave him a bit of a aural workout compared to many of the other times. Several bots were neatly lined up next to the two, Aurum having just noticed them now, and he wondered what the damned contraptions were doing as the boat was flooding. Of course, he forgot that they probably took much longer because of his time bubble, but for Dorian's talk of high quality thingamajigs and state-of-the-art equipment, the boat was oddly thin walled and the robots disappointingly bland. Maybe it was his biase coming through but Aurum groaned in annoyance as he kicked one robot on the side, stalking away as he begrudgingly mourned for his wet feet.

"I'm not going to stick around in case that blasts wide open," He declared, staring at one of the drones. "Why don't you tin cans do something about it, help poor Topaz out while I find an actual engineer, if Dorian wasn't too confident that we didn't need one."

Cracking his neck, limbering his arms, and popping his knuckles, Aurum made a quick line of bubbles across the hallway and casually walked through them, saving a few valuable seconds while oddly just casually walking away.

He needed to find someone who was capable of a problem as big as this, and unlike airships, a hole in the side wouldn't have the whole thing keel over due to its own weight sooner or later. It'd just crash. That was far more enjoyable to watch. 

7
          Professor William Nox, dust genius, was not too fond of company to say the least. Even among students who showed interest in his work he couldn’t help but try to avoid conversation straying from his line of work.  One of the students in the passenger car showed such interest in his 0ddb0ts for a fraction of a second before getting lost in his thoughts. It wasn’t at all uncommon for that to happen but the other teachers did say he needed to interact with the kids more.
Pondering on how to start a conversation he opened his mouth to speak only to be interrupted by a sudden message on the intercoms. In the corner of the passenger car, a corner speaker seemingly newly added for the purposes of the people, -regular staff having messages relayed on scrolls- chimed in:

          Attention all Passengers. A small group of grimm have been spotted mounting the train’s supply cars. For your safety please remain indoors and avoid changing cars while local security handle the situation. Thank you for your patience.

   A friendly reminder for staff of the Crimson Express. Please do not leave tools and luggage lying around the passenger cars to avoid accidents and firmly store them in the overhead compartments. Thank You.

   “Dust be damned.” The professor swore, dropping a smaller wrench as the train jostled from the back. “If you young ladies and gentlemen would kindly deal with the threat nearby, that would be great. Don’t mind the announcements, those are for rusting fools who underestimate huntresses and huntsmen in training.” Did that sound praiseworthy? He groaned for a second, bending down to reach the wrench. Whoever said programming a mech was like a conversation with the machine was a rusting idiot.    

          People were way harder to talk to.

          Instead of sending a few 0ddb0ts to deal with the threat, William let them sit by just in case something attacked the car. If needed he’d shoot some of the blasted things themselves if it came down to it but at the moment he needed to continue maintenance. A small drone flying into your face in the middle of combat due to a faulty sensor would ruin anyone’s day.

_____________________________________________________________________________

          Kei heard the announcement as she peeked into the passenger car from outside, noticing the professor preferring to stick with his machinations, and started climbing the car’s ladder. While on top she spotted several small sized nevermore harassing a couple of Atlesian knights, not numbering even a dozen, while a dozen Beowolves clawed at the side of a dust car. The distance was roughly 3 train cars away and wouldn’t take more than a moment to reach but for some reason the Grimm preferred the back. It was odd but not exactly unheard of when Grimm attacked transport vehicles so maybe this was an isolated case.

          Everyone else seemed used to the small-scale attacks and seemingly didn’t care if some stupid Grimm were right on the train. The train itself seemed pretty new for train standards but the occasional scratch marks barely covered by a new coat of paint showed that it had been running quite a few trips already.

   Kei decided to leave the grimm to the robots and proceeded to start climbing down before spotting an ursa major rushing a the car’s side. The thing was pretty large for ursa standards and shrugged off quite a number of blows before crashing into the Atlesian knights, sweeping them off a flat crate ladden car with a quick swipe of its paw. As much as she wanted to get rid of the thing herself she had to keep her identity hidden, and climbed down the car and back into the conductor’s quarters. A few engineers gave her a glance but otherwise were a bit shaken by the roars of the grimm to ask about her and went back to work.
   Were the knights really enough for the grimm? That would be impressive in its own right but she hasn’t once seen them take on larger ones without massive losses and there wasn’t a paladin in sight. Whatever, there were other students on board and they could handle it. She had more important matters to attend to.

   Not too long after her little clash with Ali a few weeks back Kei had been doing some digging. It took time away from her thieving but she managed to gather some info about a possible White Fang operation in foreverfall. There were some minor clashes outside the kingdom but she did gather enough info to track the next operation here.

Whether it be covert or something larger, she wanted to be here when something happened. Maybe she could get some answers and maybe get a chance to talk with Ali again. Who knows. But hopefully she wouldn’t have to fight. She glanced back as another roar echoed through her body. Hopefully.

8
Approved Characters / Re: Shoko-La Bitter
« on: February 25, 2018, 07:19:20 PM »
Approved

9
The Vale Region / Taking A Bull By The Horns [PLOT] [CLOSED] [FOREVER FALL]
« on: February 21, 2018, 07:35:35 AM »
     Sometimes to tell the best lies, you have to believe in them just a little bit.

     Today Kei was a conductor. A master of tickets, a local of the locomotive, and a champion of steam. Wait. Trains didn’t run on steam nowadays. Or did they ever? It’s hard to tell when studying different things for a role. Well, as long as nobody asked, Kei was a conductor, and a darned handsome one at that.

     Donning her signature faux moustache and a pretty small sized uniform to fit her light frame, Kei neatly placed the hat on her slickly combed hair and proceeded out to collecting tickets for the day. That’s what conductors did, didn’t they? Except...there were no real passengers on board except for typical train staff and some oddly militarized robots. Well, there were the students and the professor but maybe they already got covered. Damn this job was tricky.
   
   Instead of going ahead to the on passenger cart on the dust filled train, Kei just made her way out to the corridor connections and rested her back across the door in between the trains, staring out into the red leafy mess that was Forever Fall. Taking a moment to appreciate the view, Kei silently judged the streets of her memories to the mellow cascade of leaves that painted the forest red. From barely functional streets, to hard concrete jungles, and then one lair to another,and then finally a school, she had made quite a ruckus in every place she was ever in and nobody even knew who she was. A bittersweet smile arose on her lips, past the bushy moustache, and she sneezed as the prickly hairs tickled her nose and sent the thing flying off past the car.

   That was fine, she guessed, she wasn’t going to miss it anyways. Besides, why can’t a girl be a conductor for once? What name should she go for? Red? Ruby? Crimson? Damned these leaves she couldn’t think of anything but red...Fine. Red it is. Red…Bark...Not exactly a good name, a rather dumb one at that, but it was probably not gonna be much of a problem since nobody asked conductors for names. Though why she was on a train was another story all together, something she had yet to confirm before acting.

     "Ali, just what are you planning this time..."

__________________________________________________________________________

   In the passenger car of the Crimson Express, Professor William Nox, Illustrious dust genius extraordinaire, was busy giving tweaks  to one of his many odd bots, that he so conveniently named 0ddB0ts, while four other students were promptly sitting across him as well. Next to him were several machines and gadgets that even he didn’t need at the time, but there were so many that they practically filled his side of the train. Unlike the passenger dedicated ones, the car he was currently on had no dedicated rooms and all seats were in the same open space with a bit of walking space in between. On his side he pretty much hogged them all with one set of seats holding his massive wrench, while the others hand whirring machines that seemed like they might fall apart at any moment.

     The train just arrived in forever fall not too long ago and he was tasked to chaperone four huntsmen-in-training from Beacon and Atlas. Given his previous dabbles in the latter Academy, and the fact that saying no would just get people up in airs and ruin his precious work time, he agreed to taking in no more than 4 students from both schools.

     The students weren’t really given a briefing though save for the rather generic message on their scrolls reading:


   Mission XXXXXXXX

   Escort


   Task: Guard Porter Train Crimson Express to its Destination
   Date: XX_XX_XX


     Several smaller details were listed below the message with the train name and destination, the cargo, that being dust and some weapons of sorts, and local possible grimm types they might encounter. Nothing seemed to out of the ordinary for a plain escort mission for their year levels though couldn’t they have relied on their defenses for that? Perhaps they were just being paranoid or maybe they had some info they weren’t sharing. Whatever it was Professor Nox didn’t seem to care and continued tweaking his odd spider-shaped robot as a single propeller drone ran itself into a corner.

   “Biscuits, I need to fix the depth sensors on that one.” he groaned, dropping a screw and then scrambling after it with an extendable doohickey. He blabbered on to himself regarding sensors and screws and all sorts of incoherent technobabble which even the most advanced dust and mechanic student would have trouble comprehending before dropping the spider bot to the floor and walking over to the dead drone. 

          “But first...coffee.”

     Wrenching his...well, wrench off the seat beside him, he plopped the thing rightside up and began dispensing some rich dark liquid from a small compartment on the side. One sip. Ugh, too greasy, but it should do. And then he downed the thing in one go, going back to working on the oddbot on the ground.

   

10
Plot Zone / Re: Taking A Bull By The Horns [SIGN-UPS CLOSED]
« on: February 15, 2018, 03:36:39 AM »
Those participating in the thread

Vivian, Airi, Sheer, and Topaz

Will PM when thread is up.

11
Approved Characters / Re: Billy Bone
« on: February 14, 2018, 11:32:20 PM »
Should be fine as is

+1

12
The Vale Region / Re: Far From Home [CLOSED INITIATION]
« on: February 10, 2018, 06:34:37 AM »
Wisteria, still a bit red from her earlier speech, nodded at the two's suggestions. "Y-yeah. Even if I could take it by my own it'll be a waste of time. Let's just walk past it." She said, with a bit of pride. Trying to off play her earlier outburst. Walking quietly after, she sighed and stared a bit at the building with her hand resting on top of her dagger, cautious about whether or not the grimm truly would leave them alone.  Toning down her semblance, the glow from her gloves started dying down and faintly glowed under the shade of the building, still ready but less obvious to be used if needed.

13
Approved Characters / Re: Billy Bone
« on: February 08, 2018, 05:59:08 AM »
Second character so soon? Someone's excited.

Now let's see..

Species:
Faunus is spelled as so. Not Faunest

Occupation: History mentions her travelling to vale so...why the fastest gun in vacuo? Is she still in Vacuo? Also state what academy she's attending.

Appearance
Instead of enumerating her features try phrasing it as one consistent paragraph, that or bullet the features. As is, it's basically a bunch of facts jutted down when a lot of them could be condensed and connected to each other.

History
Same thing seems to happen here from time to time, there are plenty of instances where you could avoid writing several sentences and just connect them with conjunctions. Content-wise the history seems okay but I would like to know about her situation after the plan failed. You say the Hunter(supposed to be huntsman in this case) brought her to Vale. How did she get into beacon? Did she even have any prior schooling? How are her academics, did she have further training? Add that to history.

Semblance
Does the lasso move according to how she wants? How tough is it? How long does it get?

Weapon
I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure from a holstered position pistols would be way faster up close, especially compared to a lever action rifle. Not really an issue but just putting it out there.


14
Approved Characters / Re: Maria Sanguine
« on: February 08, 2018, 05:08:50 AM »
Gah, I hate the crimson font but the profile itself should be good to go.

Approved

15
Character Editing / Re: Samantha Quartz
« on: February 05, 2018, 08:58:09 PM »
So first of all this would technically be considered a new submission with all these major changes. So there's that. Other things to cover...

Format-wise the occasional wall of text that could be neatly divided into 2 or more paragraphs and the occasional unnecessary comma. Not a major issue but that's one thing.

HOODIES

-Don't see why you needed to divide casual and combat attire since they're more or less the same outfit with just a little extra. Nothing big though, no need to change.

History
 -Check for proper gender pronouns. I know this is a genderswap so please swap the pronouncs and nouns accordingly. There are still some instances of son, he, etc etc popping about and it could lead people to thinking it's referring to a different person altogether.
-SCFs?
-The whole experimentation thing is boarding on lab character territory with the whole implant and sudden killing of people. I suggest to change it

Here comes the first major issue. The criminal group seems to be a highly convenient plot device just for Sam to get her supposed enhancement through the implant and we know nothing of their background save for the fact that they're evil and sciency. Sure it's RWBY but best tech we see is from Atlas, and for some reason these criminals manage to not only kidnap a high profile huntsman's' children and use one for experimentation, but they can do it from an abandoned warehouse with enough resources to make prototype devices. Why they didn't use other less important people for experimentation we do not know, just the fact that they went all doc-oc on poor Sam. The implant and what it does isn't even described here in detail, which i guess should be covered in equipment but that's beside the point, it's still lab-character territory.

I'll be covering this with other staff and see what they think before making a final decision.

Semblance
Does way too much for a single thing, choose one and stick with it. RWBY does have semblances but it's not what defines a character or should be their main weapon unless they're a caster, so pick either sensory enhancement, manipulation, etc etc.

Especially the last two uses. Vibration storage and sound manipulation are different but related yet ultimately still different. So pick and focus on one.

Combat Behavior.
Adaptive but reminder that that doesn't mean they could make split second decision in the heat of battle if they're preoccupied with something big, like a sword swinging in their face, to the point where they'd change then and there right after the first move.

Since Rhythm is a major part of this character it would be more sensible to make the combat behavior focus on that more and not just thinking all the time to the point where it just feels like the section is just about how she's thinking. Tacticians also rely on experience and have their own way of doing things, almost as unique as combat styles. So if she is a good tactician what would be her usual way of doing things? Would she want her team to go aggressive? Just fight around until something goes wrong? Test waters and form a counterattack? Emphasize and clarify this part because it seems she's tactician in name but not substance. Just my two cents. We can't all just be Jaune shouting "Do what you're already doing!" and saying he's brilliant.


I'll be covering the implants after a little discussion. For now that's what I gotta say about the profile.











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